clever lying

Pascal says: ‘Kneel down

move your lips in prayer

and you will believe.’

In western post-Fordist

capitalism we are taught

to consume a niche

and we will be

rendered whole

our work will become

valid and worthwhile

ideology is based on

false assumptions

its all a big lie

a big fucking lie

and we go along

for the ride

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sick

we can judge a society by examining the ways in which it is ‘well’ and the ways in which it is ‘sick’. In post-Fordist western capitalism we define ‘wellness’ with reference to agents’ ability to work and shop. Production and consumption. Our leisure time is reified and our work time is mythologised.

A more accurate look at this will come courtesy of the ways in which we are ‘unwell’. Depression, anxiety, other mental health conditions, eating disorders, self harm, these things are endemic in the millenial generation.

Why?

cheese

In America you can buy a four cheese mix of shredded cheddar, monterey jack, asadero and queso blanco. The cheddar didn’t taste like cheddar and the rest didn’t taste like anything either. The scope of expectancy, decline and failure here is a direct example of American capitalism at work. Endless access, hype, an illusion of choice. The technical level of choice in volume of items is favourable but the choice is simply many examples of trivial variations and distinctions designed by agents who have been economically coerced into working within very limiting parameters which are so stringent that any notion of choice within them will be so minor as to be ultimately meaningless.

two concerts

1.

Hagar The Womb, The Cowley Club, Brighton.

The Cowley Club is an anarchist co-operative social space in Brighton. My band Austerity played a fun set supporting anarcho punk legends Hagar The Womb.. People danced. Late in the evening I am sat in the garden on my own smoking a cigarette when a strikingly beautiful girl appears, asks me my name and if she can borrow a roll up. The next thing she says is “you are very beautiful”, I assured her that she was also very beautiful but I think I sounded insincere and she was unsure if I was just being polite. I wasn’t. She put her hand on my leg gently and passionately said “do you believe in anarchism?”

It was a carefully scripted manifestation of my most perfect fantasy and yet it was one I never knew I had. Every detail; location, general context, her appearance out of nowhere piercing my solitude, her german accent. All of it was too perfect, and yes it contains a compliment to me cos this is my fantasy-reality and i’m an insecure narcissist. All of this and further still, all of this was seemingly occurring in actual reality.

I gave her lots of merch and literature about my band and we went our separate ways.

2.

Lone Taxidermist, Supernormal Festival. Oxfordshire.

I was at Supernormal Festival and I went to see Lone Taxidermist. There was a long queue outside. When we got inside everything was covered with plastic. I’d ingested a large quantity of psilcybin mushrooms and truffles, some ketamine and I’d been drinking Guinness and smoking joints since breakfast. To put it another way, I was in a fucking weird headspace. I was bothered by the close proximity of the other people in the crowd, then the group came out leering through taut transparent sheets of film, it was terrifying. I had to leave because the world was ending or something. I decided to calm down by the campfire because I fucking love campfires. This is where I met a girl. We talked all night. In the darkness I could barely make out her face in the firelight but I could tell she had a nice smile. She fell off a bench and got gin in her hair. I found this hilarious which was not the appropriate response.

When we stood up to leave I realised that she was taller than me which I didn’t expect.

We kissed a bit and went our separate ways.

3.

NOTES

These two examples are interesting because yes they both feature the notion of romance, but they are quite obviously not about sex. They are about fleeting spontaneous deep connections made with strangers. It is not sexual, it is more accurately described as a meeting of minds.

I dare not even DREAM of meeting the love of my life, all I ask is a few moments with someone being authentic and enjoying each others company. If this is my fantasy what does that say about my own sense of alienation?

What happened at the cowley club and at supernormal, these are magical spontaneous events that freed us from the reach of the spectacle. We were not producing and consuming and the primary quality of our interactions were completely divorced from the notion of production (in all its multifarious forms). They were simply about human connection in its rawest most authentic form.

In a more innocent world these moments would’ve remained beautiful vignettes in the memories of those involved. Now most likely we’ll just stalk each other on Facebook when we feel depressed and enable the spectacle to reach at the guts of its enemy. Everything that is real becomes distorted to the point where it is now false.